I’m in Mallorca with my Mum and her partner, his son and daughter and daughter’s boyfriend. We are here for a week, and I plan on making it a holiday in every single way. It’s only been a few hours but I have surprised myself at what a great time I am having. It could possibly be perpetuated due to the aid of alcohol and my light-weightedness, but honestly I am having such a pleasant time in this moment that the reasons as to why don’t even matter. I just want to make the most of this positive experience and feeling and take each moment as it comes.
Also, I have decided that I won’t be wearing sleeves when with the fam (it’s around 30-38° Celcius) and genuinely don’t mind what my step-siblings etc think – because I deserve to just let go and be myself, whatever that may look like and whatever that may be. Also, my “step-sister” has recently expressed interest around mental illness and relevant information, in a curious and actually lovely way, and she doesn’t appear to be relating to me in a judgemental way, at all. For this I am grateful, and I hope her boyfriend and brother will respond and treat me in much the same way. I plan to make the absolute most of this week, letting myself go and enabling myself to feel liberated in every way possible whilst I can. I don’t know anyone on this island besides my family and I am determined not to let my own self-judgements dictate what I can and can’t do, can and can’t wear, can and can’t be, etc. This week I am going to BE ME, and be me in my entirety.
I may post but it’s likely to be intermittent. I love getting away from my usual busy London life and keeping phone, internet and social media usage to a minimum. That in itself is liberating. I feel genuinely deserving of a break – which is a miracle in and of itself, as I don’t usually feel deserving of much at all. So hooray for that!
I hope that you are all getting on okay, wherever you are in the world. Thanks to all of you for the continual validation and encouragement. I will keep you posted – as much as is effective considering I’m on holiday. Take care y’all. Sending loving vibes as always ❤️