I seriously need to JUST STOP

Take a step back
Proceed mindfully

I am noticing my slightly “interpersonally paranoid” state kicking in, and I really need to slow down before I keep reacting to interactions with other people. 

Fewer words, less texts, more space between exchanges, less over-apologising and justifying, less reassurance-seeking, curb the bitchiness and take a break when it feels too much.

The world is not going to implode if I don’t solve everything in this instant. 

Cultivate Wise Mind; Breathe in Wise, breathe out Mind. Use your skills. Pause. Practice effectiveness. Label the cognitive distortions. Just notice. Observe, describe. Ask yourself “What is the threat?”

I literally need the STOP skill tattooed onto my eyeballs right now.


13 thoughts on “STOP

  1. Your posts are great, so easy to relate to thank you for giving such a personal insight of your life. It really helps and keeps my head above water seeing that it is possible to learn skills to help myself eventually. Out of interest and if you don’t mind me asking, how long did it take for you to learn & implement/practise wisemind, stop and more distress tolerance skills?

    Liked by 1 person

    • I was in an intensive DBT residential unit for 4 months which is where I initially learnt the skills. Learning is one thing and can be done relatively quickly (a few hours!) but practicing is a whole other ball game! And it is just that – a practice. I know the skills inside out and continue to attend DBT classes but the skills do not have an end point and therefore I have no definitive answer to your question; besides saying that I continue to practice implementing the skills as far as I am able to. I also continue failing to implement them or being too willful to implement them in other contexts. It is a practice and we gotta keep practicing, hopefully it’ll become easier, more automatic and ingrained over time ๐Ÿ˜‰

      Thanks so much for your feedback. Take care โค

      Liked by 1 person

      • Thanks for reply, that answers what I wanted to know.. I just wasn’t sure how to word the question! I guess it is hard work to retrain and override habitual ways of thinking and ways of dealing with things that have been used for years.
        I begin DBT as soon as I’m physically given the all clear after eating disorder side effects took hold. It’s nice and reassuring to read a realistic and honest account, look after yourself ๐Ÿ™‚

        Liked by 1 person

  2. I would suggest trying them out during the rare neutral moments so that when it comes to times of distress, you are prepared to implement the skills having done the drills multiple times (we use the example of firemen and their practice drills before the actual fires they have to put out!)


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